WHOOPSIE! JAMES MIDDLETON semi Nude Photos Surface!
AHHHHH I love a good scandal!
Especially when it involves exposed man meat!
As the events of last Friday proved, there is nothing the British royal family does better than pageantry, pomp and a little circumstance. Except for crazy hats. And, of course, scandal.
Which is why KATE MIDDLETON’s family is already fitting quite nicely into the royal fold and waited mere days after the newly titled duchess swapped “I dos” “I wills” with PRINCE WILLIAM to make their very first foray into Public Scandal as extended members of the royal family.
So which member of the Middletons has the honor of causing such a fuss? The only commotion Pippa is apparently capable of causing is a riot for close-ups of her derriers ? And since His and Her Royal Highness have stayed out of the public eye and Carole and Michael know better, that simply leaves one man: brother James.
And his meat. And two veg. And he likes to play with his balls….
Though, it is important to note, that at no time are his own family jewels ever on display.
What is on display—and how—is his naked torso.
Among the shots now circulating online: James in his boxer shorts with one hand casually tucked inside them; a couple full moon shots; a picture of him blowdrying his, um, gentleman garden (though he is wearing underwear in the shot and while the elastic band is being pulled away, nothing indecent is visible…better luck next time, girls); a cheeky shot of him fully clothed being, as the Brits are so fond of saying, bummed by another male pal (that the visual takes place in front of a sign post reading “Back Lane” is the first clue that it’s just a bit of boys-will-be-boys larking about); a picture of him with several other men dolled up in French maid uniforms with one of the bros munching on another man’s baguette (and despite how that sounds, no, that is not a euphemism); and, the pièce de résistance, a shot of James fully nude, sitting legs crossed, beer bottle in hand, with his hand preventing any Basic Instinct-type reenactments.
More to come, hopefully!