Category Archives: Guest Author

I Love Being Gay


Just in time for Pride, professional gay YOUTUBER  Davey Wavey has shared a new video in which he talks to other YouTubers about why they love being gay.

“Being gay is being us, being true to who we are,” said OliviaHas2MomsLateef Thynative added, “I love the fact that we have our own culture.” These YouTube stars cover a lot of territory, from having our own language, to being celebrated for who you are, to having the freedom to express yourself and dress however you want, and much more. RyannMinajj said of the impact being gay has had on him,”Not being accepted by everyone has made me accepting of everyone.”



CUDDLE, love, touch, acceptance and connection

adam lippin cuddle cuddlist

We all want love, acceptance and connection with other people. We’re social beings, and this connection with others is part of our emotional, physical and spiritual DNA.

Touch plays an important role in building these connections, increasing scientific evidence clearly shows a connection that lack of touch can lead to depression, anxiety and a myriad of heath issues, and an inability to connect with others. We will be exploring the healing power of Non Sexual, Consensual Touch in detail in upcoming posts.

Most of us don’t get enough touch in our lives.

We’re touch-deprived, and most of us don’t even know it consciously. All we know is that there’s loneliness and stress and a deep sense of missing out. We feel this because there’s a biochemical yearning for something that is missing in our lives. And there is something missing: touch and the connection with others that it fosters.

“That’s why we started Cuddlist,”  says  Adam Lippin, Co-founder and  CEO  of  CUDDLIST. Safe, non-sexual, consensual touch fills a need that’s badly neglected in our society. Cuddling relaxes us and reduces stress at the very least, and on the deeper level it nourishes our soul and helps us get in touch with our higher self. Much like yoga and meditation, non-sexual touch is healing and transformative.”

Cuddlist brings together those who need touch (and that would be just about all of us!) with Certified, professional cuddlers who are experienced, safe, well-versed in cuddling techniques and follow a code of conduct that set the conditions for a great session.

While any two people can cuddle, of course, what sets Cuddlist apart is that we are  creating the marketplace for transformative cuddling, and we bring the professionalism and best practices that make it work; Cuddlist training is overseen by my co-founder, Madelon Guinazzo, and she both has years of experience as a full-time Cuddlist and knowledge of what works in practice.


While Cuddlist is something special, and fills an important gap in our world, I also want to share what it means to me personally.

I’ve been a yoga and meditation practitioner for more than 20 years. Yoga has been an animating principle in my life that has seen me through college, drug addiction, the corporate world in New York, loss and death, and the birth of my son and my relationship with my amazing  spouse. I’m also a touchy-feely “hugger,” and when I go to shake someone’s hand I’m keenly aware how restricted touch is in our society.

Most would agree that touch is therapeutic, and the rush of oxytocin we produce when we cuddle is great, but in my experience cuddling also can be something deeper.

American Buddhist Jack Kornfield, in his book, After the Ecstasy, the Laundry: How the Heart Grows Wise on the Spiritual Path, talks about how the simple act of being present can be a deeply spiritual practice. I think cuddling, if non-sexual and approached without expected outcomes in mind, can help us be present and raise our spiritual awareness.

So while I’m a “hugger,” and I immediately see the value that cuddling can play as a corrective in our society, I also think it contains a deeply spiritual component.

Indian civil rights leader Mohandas Gandhi said we must be the change we want to see in the world, and I want to play my part by encouraging non-sexual touch and the emergence of what might be called cuddle yoga.

“Touch is important, and we don’t get enough of it. I want to change that, and that’s why I, along with my Co-Founder, started Cuddlist.  Will you join us?”

Find out more at CUDDLIST. Learn more;   FIND  a  CUDDLIST  and/or  become a CUDDLIST!




Young gay YouTube sensation TYLER OAKLEY has dropped his first trailer for his documentary, SNERVOUS.

They are over a dozen super popular gay vloggers  changing the world and how young people react towards gay people.  MILLIONS   of young people tune in to these  vloggers  daily! The YouTube medium has offered vloggers the opportunity to touch millions and millions of people from around the world.

“After eight years of sharing snippets of his life online, see the intimate truth of Tyler Oakley’s relationship with family, followers and fame on his sold out international tour.”


Snervous (documentary):
Binge (book):
Psychobabble (podcast):

Find Tyler:
Snapchat: snaptyleroakley
Bonus Videos:


Gay Day of the Dead Art

gay day of dead closet-rainbow

Gay Day of the Dead: the art of José Antonio Madrazo

By Sebastián Sáenz



History, traditions and folk culture have inspired artists for centuries in order to show the world their unique perspective. Human beings have developed a special need to express feelings, thoughts and facts though all kinds of materials such as clay, marble, wood, oil, installations, words and even their own body, but José Antonio Madrazo is a particular case. His original proposal shows one of the most popular Mexican celebrations with an unexpected twist: an LGBT version of The Day of the Dead.

gay wedding day of the dead lesbian-pink-wedding

Most of us are tired of bringing back home after any trip the same souvenirs: the cheap post card, the t-shirt that will lose all colors after the second wash, and the tacky fridge magnet. That is why José Antonio, located in the breathtakingly beautiful and LGBT friendly San Miguel de Allende (one of the most popular little towns of Mexico), got inspired by this important date in order to celebrate diverse love with his art crafts. The career of this artist started in the early 90s, he has worked with different forms of design, and his current proposal projects his identity, sensitivity, creative voice, humor and Mexican Culture, such as the Day of the Dead.


gay wedding nichos mexican art

Mexico’s Day of the Dead is a very ancient tradition that mixes Pre-Colonial, Colonial and folk elements of the Mexican culture. The day of the Dead is an annual celebration to remember the life of the loved ones that are no longer with us. Mexicans build altars with flowers, candles, photographs and objects attached to the person that passed away. They also have hot chocolate, candy skulls and Bread of Dead, a sweet pastry with bone-shaped bread sticks on top. Some people dress as Catrinas, the quintessential character of this party: the grim reaper represented as a feminine skelleton, dressed in a colorful gown with flowers and even a huge hat with bright feathers. Some Mexicans even actually go to graveyards and spend the night of November 1st and 2nd in a huge celebration with music, food and laughter; their on way to make fun of Death, and to enjoy life.



No wonder why José Antonio, along with his team of artisans, have been so inspired. All of his pieces are one of a kind, manicured and can be custom made in order to satisfy every customer’s wishes. He mixes clay figurines with traditional crafting techniques, metal, vintage photographs, images of papers, magazines and board games, and even historic heroes and religious icons. Some of his contemporary, funny, pretty and affordable pieces can even portray same sex figures and jokes.


The world usually relates Mexico to lucha libre, Taco Bell, telenovelas and, in worst cases, Dora the Explorer. Of course these are stereotypes, and even though some of them are based on actual facts, it is well known that a whole country cannot be associated with just a few generalizations. Mexico is a country that offers so much more than what the world sees on news or in a five star resort in Cancun. It is rich in gastronomy, history, infrastructure, technology, science, academia, natural resources, art and cultural and social progress. Maybe its biggest artist is Frida Kahlo, however, there are obviously new artists such as José Antonio, with innovative, interesting, intricate and beautiful work that the world has to know and appreciate.

Follow him on Facebook

Michael Snell and Derrick Sorles, partners  for  16  years,  started  collecting  Day of Dead  art  in 2013.  They found one of  Jose Antiono’s  gay themed nichos in 2014 and contacted him  about making even more  gay themed  nichos  exclusively for them and began importing them to the US.  Gay Day of the Dead Art.  Now with the passage of marriage equality growing at leaps and bounds, they hope to serve a whole new market of  LGBT collectors.



Translation –


Día de Muertos… Gay: el arte de José Antonio Madrazo
Por Sebastián Sáenz

Historia, tradiciones y folclor han inspirado a artistas durante siglos para mostrar al mundo su perspectiva única. Los seres humanos han desarrollado una necesidad especial para expresar sus sentimientos, pensamientos y hechos a través de diversos materiales como arcilla, mármol, madera, óleo, instalaciones, palabras e incluso su propio cuerpo, pero José Antonio Madrazo es un caso particular. Su original propuesta muestra una de las celebraciones mexicanas más populares con un giro inesperado: una versión LGBT del Día de Muertos.

La mayor parte de nosotros estamos hartos de regresar a casa de cualquier viaje con los mismos souvenirs: la tarjeta postal barata, la playera que perderá sus colores después de lavarla dos veces y el imán de mal gusto para el refrigerador. Es por eso que José Antonio, ubicado en el maravillosamente bello y LGBT amigable San Miguel de Allende (uno de los pueblitos más populares de México), se inspiró en esta importante fecha para celebrar el amor diverso en sus artesanías. La carrera de este artista comenzó a principios de los 90s, ha trabajado con diferentes formas de diseño, y su propuesta actual refleja su identidad, sensibilidad, voz creativa, humor y cultura mexicana; como en el caso del Día de Muertos.

Esta fiesta anual es una antigua tradición que mezcla elementos prehispánicos, coloniales y folclóricos de la cultura mexicana. El día de muertos ayuda a recordar a la gente amada que ya no se encuentra presente. Los mexicanos crean altares con flores, velas, fotografías y objetos que los difuntos apreciaban. También toman chocolate caliente, calaveras de dulce y Pan de Muerto, pan dulce cubierto con palos de pan que semejan huesos. Algunas personas se visten como Catrinas, el personaje de esta celebración por excelencia: representa a la muerte como un esqueleto femenino, ataviado con un colorido vestido con flores e incluso un gran sombrero con brillantes plumas. Algunos mexicanos incluso visitan cementerios y pasan las noches del 1 y 2 de noviembre en una gran verbena con música, comida y risas; su manera única de burlarse de la muerte y de disfrutar la vida.

Es evidente por qué José Antonio, junto con su equipo de artesanos, se han inspirado tanto. Todas sus piezas son únicas, delicadamente construidas, y pueden personalizarse para satisfacer cada deseo de sus clientes. Combina figuras de arcilla y metal con técnicas artesanales típicas, viejas fotografías, imágenes de periódicos, revistas y juegos de mesa, y hasta personajes históricos e íconos religiosos. Y claro, algunas de sus piezas contemporáneas, divertidas, bonitas y accesibles pueden mostrar figuras del mismo sexo y chistes.

El mundo usualmente relaciona a México con la lucha libre, Taco Bell, telenovelas y, en los peores casos, Dora la Exploradora. Claro que éstos son estereotipos, y aunque algunos de ellos están basados en la realidad, es bien sabido que un país entero no puede asociarse solo con algunas generalidades. México es un país que ofrece mucho más de lo que el mundo ve en las noticias y de lo que un turista puede experimentar en un hotel de cinco estrellas en Canc ún. Es rico en gastronomía, historia, infraestructura, tecnología, ciencia, academia, recursos naturales, arte y progreso social y cultural. Quizá su artista más famoso es Frida Kahlo, sin embargo, obviamente hay nuevos artistas como José Antonio, con un trabajo innovador, interesante, detallado y bello que el mundo debe conocer y apreciar.

Fifty Ways to Eat Cock

cock cook book

For the cook in your life!

Curious about cock?

You’re not the only one. Once revered for his virility and strength, the rooster has taken a back seat to the hen in more recent years. With healthy chicken recipes like Risotto Cock Balls and Cock-o’s, 50 Ways to Eat Cock is a fun and inventive chicken cookbook that takes a revealing look at the folklore, history, culinary culture and nutritional benefits of this well-endowed ingredient.

With tongue-in-cheek descriptions, these playful cock recipes are bulging with everything from the quintessential to the quick-and-easy to the downright quirky. You’ll learn how to tame this tough bird meat into succulent and finger-licking gourmet meals.




Waymon Hudson Activist – Fight OUT Loud


Early on the morning of May 1, 2007, around 1 am, my partner and I were returning home to Fort Lauderdale from vacation in Chicago.   Our flight was delayed, so we were the last group of passengers (around 20 or so) at Fort Lauderdale/Hollywood International Airport.

While waiting for our luggage in the baggage claim area, we heard these words come over the PA system loud and clear:

A man that lies with a man as with a woman should be put to death.

A few minutes later, the same Biblical recording played over the loud speaker again.  We were understandably shocked and frightened.

We looked around for a security guard, airport employee, or TSA agent, but we were unable to find anyone because it was so late and everything was closed.  We quickly gathered our bags and went to our car, nervous to be alone in a dark parking garage after hearing what we assumed was a death threat against us.

The next morning, we called the airport to report the incident. The airport manager seemed disinterested in the threat and simply said “sorry for the inconvenience.”   After the tepid response from the manager, we contacted our county commissioner, as well as a local news station.  We also contacted various web sites and blogs about our experience, including Pam’s House Blend and Towleroad (who were amazing in their support!) to try and get some help.


A few nights later, we received a call from the police saying that they were able to locate the person who made the announcement and that he confessed.  The man was Jethro Monestine, a skycap for Superior Aircraft Services, who worked in  the baggage claim area.  After seeing the intense media coverage, a co-worker turned him in, fearing they too would be in trouble.  Monestine said that he downloaded the recording onto his cell phone and played it over the intercom as a “prank”.  He also claimed not be directing it at us, saying he was “bored between flights and just wanted to have some fun”.  He was eventually fired, but no charges were filed against him for what can only be seen as making a death threat over the PA at a major US airport.


The intense media coverage, as well as the religious aspect of the recording, led to a large amount of negative feedback and hate-mail being directed towards us.  Adding to this backlash was some skewed and sensationalistic reporting of our story, which included headlines that focused on the “bible verse” aspect of this incident, not the threat (one such example: “Prankster fired for playing bible verse that offended gays”).  This opened us up for attack from a number of conservative groups, blogs, and radio shows.  Websites and open forums began to fill with personal attacks directed at us.  Every anti-gay slur, threat of damnation and condemnation of us that you could imagine appeared.  Our motives, names, and even our appearance were viciously attacked.

 The media coverage made us public enemy #1 for the extreme religious movement.  A few days after they identified Monestine, a woman stopped me in our neighborhood grocery store and said, “Didn’t I see you on the news?”  I said yes, and she looked me in the eye and replied, “You faggots deserve exactly what that man said.”  The next day, my car windshield had “FAG!” scrawled across it.  I was so concerned that I ended up driving around our neighborhood so no one could follow me home.  My partner received hate mail at his work.  We even had dubious–looking people lurking around our house and looking in our windows.  It reached the point where a woman again came up to me in the grocery store, but this time she spit in my face and called me “sinful faggot.”  The backlash reached a level where it became dangerous and made us fear for our safety. We ended up having the police pass by our home every few hours for days because the threats grew so violent.

This whole event really woke us up to the amount of hate that people are still capable of directing towards the GLBT community.  We received numerous stories from people around the country telling us their own horror stories of discrimination and not being taken seriously.  As with our own story, a lot of smaller incidents of discrimination and hate seemed to fall through the cracks, leaving many people to fend for themselves. Having gone through such an eye-opening experience, and finding that there were really very few resources available to LGBT individuals who needed immediate help in situations like ours, we decided to fight back.  This inspired us to form a national non-profit organization called Fight OUT Loud.  


While the experience of the airport and the ensuing backlash may have been difficult, it was probably one of the best things that could have ever happened to me.  It changed my life, got me involved, and started an amazing organization that is helping people across the country.


Fight OUT Loud has a strong online presence and will continues to help people by being where they are- through Twitter, Facebook and other online platforms.”  explains  Waymon.

We’re filling the gap for people who don’t know where to go with their issues. We have strong ties with existing organizations and help connect people to the resources and support they need. Most of our work is very individual- we are here to make sure no LGBT issue falls through the cracks. Whether it be doing the research about local ordinances to help in an individual case of discrimination or helping educate the community about a larger LGBT issue, we really work to make sure no one, no matter where they are or what they are going through, feels alone when faced with bias, discrimination, or violence. Most of our work and projects are extremely targeted and individual.”


JOIN their mailing and action list to stay in the loop.

One gay man- lots of opinions… Journalist, Activist, Blogger, Politico, TV host, & all around political trouble-maker.

Follow  Waymon  on TWITTER


Waymon on Huffington Post

Waymon on Bilerico Project


Straight Pride and Gay Pride


Gay Pride parades were created as an answer to oppression and unequal rights. I’ve heard people say “you don’t see Straight Pride parades”…and that’s because straight people don’t need them.

No one’s calling straight slurs out of car windows or getting up in churches and telling them their unions are unholy and their very lives are condemning them to hell.

PRIDE PARADES -As long as we’re legally and socially held back, they are absolutely necessary. They don’t say “I’m special” so much as they say, “we exist.”

In Huffington Post – Shane Jordan explores Straight Pride….Pride is a deliberate attempt to equalize a society. Pride is a statement, an attitude and a decision. You see, we have been questioned and accused, abused and diminished for the entirety of history. We have been told that we are deficient and defective. It’s assumed by much of the population that we are either mentally ill or dealing with residual emotional baggage brought on by childhood tragedy. It’s assumed that our misguidance or rebellion can be fixed through therapy and that, perhaps, we will eventually abandon our lifestyle and become heterosexual.    READ MORE  HERE


Jeza Belle’s Pink Panty Dropper cocktail

Internationally known New York City drag queen, actress, comedienne, columnist, and cocktail connoisseur Jeza Belle will make her publishing debut on October 7, with The Harlot’s Guide To Classy Cocktails.

Part drink recipe book, part he-larious drunken memoir, the coffee table book contains Jeza’s own classy (The Dietrich) and, uh, not-so-classy (MAI Cock is TAI-ed Back) cocktail recipes along with the favorite drinks and messy memories of some of the world’s most famous drag queens, among them, Sherry Vine, Latrice Royale, Barbie Breakout and Rupaul’s Drag Race contestant,Yara Sofia. (See the full list of twisted queens here.)


Other queens featured include a #1 Billboard artist, reality show winners and contestants, social media sensations, rising pop stars, and a bevy of other bevvy lovers from over a dozen countries on six continents.

New York’s own Lady Bunny wrote the book’s hilarious introduction.

The Harlot’s Guide to Classy Cocktails will be available on October 7 in hardcover and eBook (iBook, Kindle, Nook) formats. Much more to come from Jeza Belle in anticipation of the books’ debut, including a trailer video, website, and a weekly reveal of each of the featured queens starting in August.Meanwhile, check out Jeza’s YouTube channel where you’ll find her zany comedic/sci-fi web series, “Jeza and the Belles” and clips of her live at various NYC clubs, such as Caroline’s Comedy Club and The Duplex.

You can find her celebrity interview column for Starpulse here.     


OWN IT by Tabatha Coffey

Fans know Tabatha Coffey as the celebrity hairstylist who’s tough, talented, and always ready to take over.

But while promoting her new book, “Own It: Be the Boss of Your Life — at Home and in the Workplace,” the 44-year-old star of Bravo’s “Tabatha Takes Over” shed some light on how her unconventional childhood drove her to become the strong, successful businesswoman she is today.

Raised mostly by her single mother, Coffey spent much of her free time at her family’s strip club where she quickly learned the power of hair and beauty. “I was at the club all the time,” she told Yahoo. “I would sit back and take a good look at how [the models] got their makeup, costumes, and wigs on and they put me to work. Even as a little kid, I just saw the transformation it did to them.”


I personally loved her swag and attitude event before she came out (publically)! Now I have even more respect for  this out and proud lesbian woman who is strong and empowering.   She gives  a GREAT INTERVIEW  HERE  with  Lesbian Life.

IN HER NEW BOOK,  Own It!: Be the Boss of Your Life–at Home and in the WorkplaceTabatha is back to share her secrets of business success . . .

With her characteristic savvy expertise and no-nonsense advice, the perfectly coiffed celebrity hairstylist, Tabatha Coffey, returns with her second book, teaching readers that the secret of success is taking charge—of your priorities, your future, and your life. Fans of her hit show, Tabatha Takes Over, value Tabatha’s sound approach to overhauling failing businesses, and now, in Own It!, she takes to the page to reach out to anyone with a dream: whether you’re just beginning, revamping your career, or starting your own enterprise.

Sharing her blunt but rock-solid wisdom, Tabatha provides tips for every aspect of business—from entrepreneurship, to customer service, to management—as well as on the home front, to help women seeking to balance their family lives with their careers. Filled with stories about real people who have faced challenging transitions, in addition to anecdotes from Tabatha’s own experiences, this book reveals, through her unflinching honesty, Tabatha’s commitment to the dreams and goals of her readers, and her never-say-never attitude when it comes to bringing them to life.

Success is the result when you Own It! in all aspects of your life, and Tabatha breaks it down step-by-step as your straight-shooting personal coach to show you how it’s done.


Own It!: Be the Boss of Your Life–at Home and in the Workplace




Gay Dating Nightmares


we all have had them! 
Check this out, by guest author Robert Kingett….


Text can show a lot of things about a person. When someone sends an email, it shows the reader three very important traits.

How articulate they are. Email requires thought in order to expand on
thoughts and if the message is short then the person can’t even think
their way out of a shirt.

Effort. If the person writes a long message then the person has a lot
of diligence and it shows that he can stay on task and get things done.

How deep their head goes. A long email shows more than what they want
to reveal, such as how deep their well is for example. Short messages
usually translate into “there’s a lot of hot air in this blimp”

But Email can’t show you everything about a person and this is why
that initial phone call is important. This next contestant in my quest
to find my forever catches me on a Sunday.

Sundays are dangerous days for me, but not nearly as dangerous as my
wandering fingers when I’ve exhausted all work and have no video games
to play. My boredom, or hormones, finds me goggling at brown abs and
bulging arm muscles in the wee hours of the afternoon. I’m looking at a
stomach the color of brown sugar pulsating with biceps when a message
flies into my dating inbox. It’s very rare this happens so I eagerly
click into the message. The spelling and grammar is as flawless as a
tax-free society but the message is very short – waving red flags at me
that I don’t see.

“Hi. My name is Jason. I recognize you. You’re a journalist. Love
your work. I want to chat more, Babe. Is that okay? Please say yes. I
think we should. I think that’s fair.”

I can hear the eagerness behind his message so I check him out. His
face is brown, as I hoped it would be, and it sports a smile that’s
brimming on being cute. He has a balled head, and I can see that he’s 10
years older than me. His smile is wide though and this tells me that
there are guys who enjoy having fun outside of the bedroom. Because the
fridge is being unusually quiet tonight I dish out my cell number like
it’s a lottery ticket and wait for the winning call.

Not even a minute later my phone vibrates. I answer it almost
expecting Denzel Washington to greet me and propose but what meets my
ear is a husky mesh of needy and overwhelming clinginess. There’s also
slurring in his voice that I don’t pay attention to because it’s deep,
and a baritone always gets me going. The pleasantries are out of the way
very quickly and we know a bit about each other. Before long, we’re
discussing what kinds of sexual acts we like to do, and then we focus on
each other and what we’d do to one another.

The entire time this is happening I try and throw in questions where
he’ll have to give me a detailed answer but he somehow doesn’t hear them
and proceeds to tell me what an inspiration I am with a slur behind a
few syllables. I notice how frequently the slur happens. A lull in the
conversation comes when he admits that he’s not a man’s man. He also
keeps asking me if random points he’s made are fair, like we’re having
an argument over the remote and he needs Jerry Springer to tell me that
he knows the buttons better than I do.

“Really?” I say, not shocked at all given the way he’s been telling me that I’m good looking for the past 45 minutes.

“Yeah. I’m not a mankind of guy. I don’t attract them very much. I want to listen to you more. Is that fair?”

I don’t understand the question but I plow on before I idly remember
that I really should be turning in for the night because I have an
important meeting to get to in the morning.

“That’s a definite shame. I hate to be a prude, but, I have a meeting
I have to get to in the morning and I need my sleep.” The reply slams
into my ear with quick bursts of syllables, as if he’s dying and my
voice is a resuscitator.

“Listen, babe… I know you don’t like me, and I get it, no one does,
but please baby, I want to talk some more. I think you’re hot! Just stay
and talk. I want to talk. Is that fair?”

“It’s not you. I don’t think you understand that I have a meeting in
the morning that I can’t sleep through.” There’s a heavy sigh on the
other end, followed by the unmistakable swigging of a bottle. I then
realize that he’s been drunk this entire conversation. I make even
louder noises about having to go, but the crying reply makes me stop and

“Please… baby, I’m an alcoholic, I get it, but I think that we
deserve to talk things over, is that fair? Is that fair? I mean, we’ve
both been alone so…” there’s another swig. “We need to cuddle with one

“You know what? I agree!” I gaily squeal, and begin doing a Google
search on my computer. The slur is emphasized as he asks me where I
live. I tell him the address to Alcoholics Anonymous in Chicago, and I
give him their number instead of mine – he’s forgotten mine already.

“Please call me tomorrow baby. I love you.” I say, hanging up the
phone knowing that I will never hear from this diplomat again. Given the
last hour, I’d say that’s pretty fair.

Read  more  from  Robert Kingett!


Davey Waveys Top Resolutions


Gay dating: The succulent surprise

  GAY DATING  with  Guest Author Robert Kingett 

 Clocks. All they do is tick and make people fret. I’ve been waiting for the latest contestant in the endless game show that is my dating life to turn up. I don’t believe in fashionably late – stylish punctuality is much more my kind of thing – and tardiness should always be explained with a conciliatory text or even a phone call. So far, nothing.

As I’m waiting many things become apparent to me. Its two minutes past the meeting time. I should never arrive first on a date. I should have brought an iPod so that I could read while he grips me in suspense. When I check my cell again its six minutes past the appointment time. With each cast of my baby blues I notice that the original appointment time creeps further away like a detoured fox.
I have to say that I didn’t expect to be waiting on this dashing dude wishing that I had brought my iPod. His profile drew me with quotes from S, E. Hinton and fervent affirmations about is point of view on misogynistic literature. I messaged him eagerly ready to break out the tea bags and sit in front of the screen ready for an intellectual massage. When I click on the send message button it is his picture that makes my mouth salivate. I’m a teenager again as my one good eye stares at a body that’s too good to be true. Taking up the length of the frame and only a fraction of the width, a slightly muscular beanpole stands beside a pool of bubbling water with a face that looks as if it’s been specifically designed to be sexy, cute, and friendly at the same time, sporting a smile that could inspire paintings. Black as the ace of spades, I can see that he easily stands at six feet tall. His eyes are wide and inviting and I can even see them in the picture, something I’m rarely able to do. I suddenly remember what I’m supposed to be introducing and write something about myself, preying to the gay gods that he writes me back with something fresh and vibrant and containing substance… and more pictures.
Read what happens next!

Blindness doesn’t stop Robert Kingett from becoming a Digital Journalist

 Our new guest author Robert Kingett was featured on Digital Journal this week, talking about how he hopes  his reporting will educate and inspire.

“I think that the biggest misconception people
have is that blind people sit in a corner and suck their thumb.”
Kingett, 24, says he is devoted to combatting that stereotype by being
an active reporter, studying journalism and writing articles on on accessibility issues.

Whatever doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. That could be the motto for Kingett, a Chicago writer and LGBT activist who is no stranger to adversity.


My gay dating Percentage…by Robert Kingett

My fingers hover over the keyboard, spread as if they are spiders who are confused on how to make a web.

resting at the forefront of my dating regime, at a desk in my apartment
trying to think of something about me that the members of this gay
dating site need to know. Ironically this part of the initiation is the

signup was easy for my adaptive computer technology that robotically
tells me everyone’s messages, height, and weight. There weren’t any
words I had to type to verify my identity, there weren’t any
advertisements sprinkled into a profile detailing a guy who likes to
pretend to fly with toy airplanes. Everything is smooth like melted
butter until this part in the acquaintance, the about me.

thought process seems to have a planned detour; as if my brain schemed
how it was going to depart at the exact moment I need it to work its
magic. First, dictation, then there’s deliberation, then debating, then
dumbstruck diatribe. My fingers don’t move but deductions springs into
my mind like a sweptback gymnast.

will marvel at my eloquence for words upon first glance so this will
whisk me up to an 80% on the attraction slider. When they talk with me
verbally however, I’m sure the stammer will jab me down to 45%.

people read that I have a white cane my dating chances will shoot down
to 30%. I know this figure based on experience. To boost my score
perhaps I should entice them first with facts about my journalism work
where I detail LGBT news and issues, and couple that with my obsessive
love for mint chocolate chip ice cream and pony rides. If I do that my
percentage will shoot up to 45% because everybody loves chocolate ice
cream way before mint. 

Read more at Roberts blog!


Robert Kingett – On Fifty Shades of Grey


For those who don’t know me, and that would be a lot of you, I’m a
bibliophile. My vast array of bookshelves is stacked with dozens of
audio books, causing the shelf to topple over like a lopsided tower. I
love books, and I love the character developments, the plots, and
thriving stories hat books can hold between the spines. I’ve read some
amazing books, and then again I’ve read some books that I’ve never want
to speak of again because it leaves a bad ringing in my ears.

never usually get into erotica books, but with the eloquent urging of
all my hip unliterary friends I decided that I’d read fifty Shades of
Grey by E.L. James. I want to see just why this book is so very popular.
I get recommendations from people all the time on Goodreads, so why is
this book so popular? Is it the dashing romance, the zesty sex scenes,
or the riveting character depth? I don’t know.

Usually when I look
at a book, I look at the synopsis of the book to try and gage what I’ll
be in store for. I wonder what the back of this book says.

literature student Anastasia Steele goes to interview young
entrepreneur Christian Grey, she encounters a man who is beautiful,
brilliant, and intimidating.

Is it just me but after
twilight by Stephenie Meyer came out all the men seem to have the same
abusive controlling elements as Edward? I don’t know. This does sound
interesting though. Nothing about gay black men or even straight black
men for that matter. I’m sad now… I need Morgan freeman to hold me and
give me God powers. I need to have Denzel Washington wrap me up in a
nice bear hug and have his sexy new Yorkers voice put me to sleep with
him reading my Miranda rights…

“You have a right to have sex wit
me. Anyting you say will get me hard and then I’ll have to arrest you
with my passion… anyway… Let’s keep reading!



Meet Robert Kingett – Our new guest author who talks about being Blind, Gay and Dating!

Do you ever stop and think about those who are less fortunate than us?  Those who have a harder life than us? Those who may face challenges?  Do you ever give gratitude and thanks for the life you are living?

Meet Robert Kingett: Watching Robert walk into his local Chicago college with his red and white cane isn’t amazing.
What is amazing, however, is listening to the story of struggle to success that he so captivatingly tells as a motivational speaker.
Today he is an honors student at The City College of Chicago getting his general transfer degree. He has been on the Deans’ list ever since his first semester ended. He’s always on the honor roll. In his spare time he’s just like any other young adult. Frequent nights at the movies with his friends, an arcade game or two at the local mall, a nice fun trip to the coffee shop where his friends embrace life along with him, or a solitary quiet trip to the library or the bookstore are just a few of the activities that he does amongst his hard work.
Even with the plethora of activities he likes to frequent the bookstore the most.
“I’ve always been a veracious reader… book worm… my audio book count is way higher than my body fat,” he said laughing.
He’s not just a hard worker in college. He’s a hard worker in the literary market. He’s a writer, having published many reviews, literary essays, poems, and accessibility related articles for a wide range of media both print and online. He’s a regular editor for Americascomedy.Com while also maintaining a third hobby of motivationally speaking.
He tells his story at personal bookings that he schedules himself throughout many venues. He tries to speak at schools the most if he can.
Kingett hopes to bring some of the troubles that abused kids endure, and ways to overcome and shine. “I want to inspire others to do way more than I have accomplished!”
Every story has a once upon a time. With the exception of his premature birth, the first six years of Kingett’s life were his most tranquil. Weighing a mere 6 ounces, a hospital error would lead to his disabilities on September 9, 1989.
“They placed me in an incubator because my lungs weren’t developing adequately and they were not monitoring the oxygen level,” he said. “It was too much so it caused me to have cerebral palsy and blindness.”
While his mother visited occasionally, his maternal grandparents raised him in St. Augustine Florida
Even though his grandmother had Alzheimer’s and dementia, he said, “I lived a spoiled life.”
Shortly before his eighth birthday, his grandmother had a stroke and had to go into a nursing home. Shortly after, his grandfather died from cirrhosis of the liver.
He had no idea what he was in store for when he first moved in with his mother and younger half sister and brother.
“I realized it pretty quickly after the first argument between her and her husband that this was not going to be a good situation,” he said. “They were both intoxicated and they got physical and verbal.”
Afterward, she would come into his room.
“She didn’t know how to let that anger go and so she’d turn it on me and my sister,” he said.
Kingett said his mother’s words varied but they often reflected what he believes she really wanted to say to her boyfriends and ex-husband.
If he or his sister ever talked back, she would then get physical he said, slapping them multiple times, and calling them pitiless names. Cries and complaints were not heard as the mother’s intoxication took over.
Sometimes he would hit back, but he said that only made her hit harder.
While the physical abuse happened only about four times a week, the verbal abuse was constant he said, attributing much of it to his mother’s constant alcohol abuse.
Kingett never called the police about the abuse. Even when the police came due to his mother’s domestic violence situations, he would lie to keep her out of jail.
“To me it was normal,” he said. “I was trying to protect the roof I had over my head. Facing the expected was a lot better alternative than going into an unknown foster system.”
Kingett said he feared what life would be like if he was removed from the home by the government. Numerous times, DCF, Department of children and families would have to investigate a suspicious complaint about Kingett or his siblings.
A smart kid, Kingett would ace tests at the Florida School for the Deaf and Blind but he consistently neglected homework.
It was during a meeting with the principal at age 14 when he had his first life changing epiphany.
“I came to the conclusion that if I stayed here, I’m not going to be successful at all,” he said.
At age 16, he began researching how to get his social security disability checks signed over to his name instead of his mother’s. The plan was to take the $625 a month and move out. The research wasn’t easy, as he was also trying not to flunk his classes while the neglect and abuse was still taking place at the home. Eventually, the research was replaced by diligent schoolwork until a year later.
At 17, he called the social security office and was told the only way the money could be signed over to him was to attend a hearing.
“I froze when I was told that because I knew that my mom had to be in on the knowhow,” he said. “I tried to keep it a secret from mom as long as I could but she could see the mail coming in and I could not. When she saw that hearing notice, she became extremely angry because that was I taking her money away. She said, ‘How could I do such a thing. Your sister and I live off that money. That’s how you are able to have a roof over your head.’”
The day of the meeting was a mere week from his 18th birthday.
Kingett said his mother tried to make him look incompetent, telling the social worker that he didn’t know how to clean his own room much less tie his own shoes.
The social worker sided with Kingett, but there was one big problem.
“I couldn’t cash any of it,” he said.
Kingett did not have a bank account, a state id, or even access to his birth certificate.
Once he got home, the violence escalated.
“She hit me so much it knocked me out and into consciousness,” he said. “I had to leave because I didn’t know what was going to happen to me if I stayed there. I grabbed my cane and backpack, threw old dirty clothes in it, and walked out the front door.
Kingett left his home and soon stayed with a family friend, Kevin, until he moved in with a woman named Debra. Knowing Robert had nowhere to go; she offered him a place to stay. Kingett stayed there until his high school graduation.
He graduated in June of 2010.
Graduating high school was only half the battle. Kingett’s plans were to attend a college and pursue his long awaited dream of getting a degree in journalism or English. He needed a way to pay for school, and that’s when the scholarship hunt began.
“I had a really hard time meeting the requirements of a scholarship, any, for that matter.” He said. “My high school grades were not good due to my negligence of school work despite my intelligence, so I had a low grade point average.”
Kingett would apply to many scholarships only to be denied.”
Determined to find a place where he could be independent he scoped the internet hunting for a place to live.
“I admit I can’t cook. I can definitely eat though.” he said laughing. “I needed a place that wasn’t a nursing home, per say, but just a fractional inch more assistance I could use. I have cerebral palsy and there are just some things that I simply need help with.”
After months of looking he found Freedman Place. Friedman Place is a non-profit Supportive Living Community for blind and visually impaired adults in Chicago. Their building has been designed with the needs of the blind and visually impaired in mind. Each resident has a private studio or one-bedroom apartment, with a kitchenette and bathroom. A full range of services and activities is provided so that residents’ days are healthy, dignified, and stimulating
“I needed a place to stay. This place sounded wonderful! That way, flux would be minimal. No more would I ever have to rely on friends.”
Since Kingett has stayed at this helpful place, he can finally let the past go and have a little fun at last.
“It’s not about the horrors I’ve gone through it’s about me overcoming so many things,” he said, attributing his sense of humor to his positive outlook.
His reward comes in the form of emails and postings on his website from students who say their lives were changed by his tale.
“I can’t tell you how awesome it was that I could make someone happier,” he said.
But now that Kingett has secured his present, what is his future dream? “I dream that one day I could be standing in a bookstore at a book signing of my own and knowing in my mind that I have improved so many lives.”
Read His Column at BEST GAY NEWS

CNNMoney – Many same-sex couples eligible for big tax refunds


Married same-sex couples who paid extra tax because
the federal government didn’t recognize their marriage are now eligible
to get some of that money back.

The Defense of Marriage Act, or DOMA, defined marriage as between a
man and a woman, which meant married same-sex couples had to file their
taxes individually. But the Supreme
Court’s summer ruling
overturned that law. Now these couples are
not only able to file as married going forward, but they have the option
of amending their tax returns for the past three years if it would
benefit them. 

 For some couples, doing this will reduce their overall tax liability
and result in big refunds, which is typically the case when there is a
large disparity in incomes (for example, when one spouse doesn’t
work).They can also claim any tax paid on health
insurance benefits extended from one spouse to another through an
employer-sponsored plan.

Refunds will vary widely by couple, and could be as high as tens of thousands of dollars.
Janet and Janet Emery-Black, from Nampa, Idaho, are anticipating retroactive refunds totaling $30,000. Another couple,

Adele and Jennifer Hoppe-House
, from Los Angeles, expect to get back $13,000.



Can Gay Porn Turn a Straight Man Pro Gay?

Can watching porn turn
straight men pro gay?

by Shaun Knittel
Best Gay News Magazine Staff Writer
Mark Regnerus, a sociology professor at the University of
Texas, made headlines for publishing a controversial study (which many found
flawed) that claimed children of gay parents were worse off than children of
straight parents, is back in the spotlight for a new bizarre claim: He says
that straight men who watch porn are more likely back same-sex marriage.
Regnerus summarized his study on the website for the
Witherspoon Institute, an organization that’s linked to the National
Organization for Marriage, by saying that porn “undermines the concept that in
the act of sexual intercourse, we share our body and whole self … permanently
and exclusively.On the contrary, it reinforces the idea that people can share
their bodies but not their inmost selves, and that they can do so temporarily
and (definitely) not exclusively without harm.”
According to the study, porn makes the viewer believe that
sex has nothing to do with marriage, and this leads to straight men accepting
gay marriage.
“Of the men who view pornographic material ’every day or
almost every day,’” Regnerus writes, “54 percent ’strongly agreed’
that gay and lesbian marriage should be legal, compared with around 13 percent
of those whose porn-use patterns were either monthly or less often than
The Texas professor, however, does not discuss how porn
impacts women. In fact, he claims that “women typically aren’t as into
porn as men are, and yet women in general tend to support same-sex marriage
more readily than do men. A recent Gallup poll noted that 56 percent of women
favor it, while only 42 percent of men do. No, this theory is not about
Earlier this year, social scientists and scholars slammed
Regnerus’ anti-gay parenting study, in which he said that children of same-sex
parents were worse off than children from straight parents.
Reaction to his work was so ill-received that some claimed
that he violated ethical standards when researching the study, called “New
Family Structures Study,” and officials from the University of Texas,
where Regnerus teaches, launched an investigation. The result concluded the
professor did not violate ethical standards nor break any rules.


The study surveyed about 3,000 18 to 39 year olds who were
mostly raised by straight parents: 175 individuals said they had mothers who
once had a same-sex relationship and 73 said their fathers were involved with
someone of the same sex. The results claim that children from these parents are
more likely to end up on welfare, be unemployed, and attend therapy as adults
when compared to children from straight couples.
The initial study outraged LGBT rights organizations such as
GLAAD, the Human Rights Campaign and Family Equality Council, calling the paper
flawed, misleading, and scientifically unsound.
In November, the professor admitted that his controversial
study was flawed but still supported his findings. He told Focus on the
Family’s Citizen Magazine that he would be more careful about the language he
used in his findings in the future.

“I said ’lesbian mothers’ and ’gay fathers,’ when in
fact, I don’t know about their sexual orientation; I do know about their
same-sex relationship behavior.” he said. “But as far as the findings
themselves, I stand behind them.”


Young Avengers Teen Super Heroes

Mainstream comics’ 

introduces a gay couple (kind of)

By Shaun Knittel

Best Gay News Magazine Staff Writer


Marvel Comics has announced a renewed focus on its Avengers
comics. The company is set to release a spin-off about a team of teenage
superheroes called, Young Avengers. 


Queerty reports, “Joining Kid Loki, Miss America and Marvel
Boy are Wiccan and Hulkling, one of mainstream comics’ most prominent (and
cutest) gay couples.


Wiccan and Hulking were actually a part of an earlier Young
Avengers title created by gay screenwriter Allan Heinberg) that was sadly
canceled some time back.”

Writer Kieron Gillen says, they will be the “core romantic
couple of Young Avengers.”

“Wiccan will make a big mistake,” warns Gillen, “that
threatens his relationship with the shape shifting Hulkling.”

“Do they have Grindr in the Marvel Universe?” asks Queerty.

“Fundamentally, ‘Young Avengers’ used to be about being
sixteen,” said Gillen, who also gave a brief summary of how the character
grew up in the original series. “I wanted to do something different.
Instead of being a book about being 16, it’s a book about being 18. It’s about
approaching the world on your own terms.” Gillen stated he plans to
explore the superhero convention from top to bottom. “Most of the books
that have ‘Avengers’ in the title is about the ideal. It’s about super heroism
and living as one of Earth’s Mightiest Mortals. … It’s a book about optimism
and how optimism tends to get crushed.”

Gillen characterized the book as “very natural,”
saying, “There’s nothing that is less cool than desperately grasping to be

He wants to focus on the full range of teenage problems
through a superhero lens. 


Seattle Begins to Issue Marriage Licenses

Seattle Issues First Same Sex Marriages Licenses After Nov.

by Shaun Knittel

Big Gay News Magazine Staff Writer

 On December 5, Governor Chris Gregoire (D-WA) and Secretary
of State Sam Reed certified Referendum 74, the marriage equality bill that
makes same-sex marriage legal in the state . 

“This is a very important and historic day in the great
state of Washington. For many years now, we’ve said, ‘One more step. One more
step.’ This is our last step,” Gregoire said. “To the couples that
are here today that will finally be treated with the equality they’ve deserved
for many years, congratulations to each of you.”

On midnight, December 6, King County Executive Dow
Constantine signed the first same-sex marriage license in Washington State for
Jane Abbott Lighty and Pete-e Petersen at the King County Recorder’s Office in
Seattle, Washington. The office opened at 12:01 a.m. to begin issuing marriage
licenses to same-sex couples for the first time after Washington voters chose
to legalize same-sex marriage in November’s election… 

Dozens of gay and lesbian couples attained their marriage
licenses.  King County, the state’s
biggest county, opened the doors to its auditor’s office shortly after

King County Executive Dow Constantine said, “People who have
been waiting all these years to have their rights recognized should not have to
wait one minute longer.”

In Seattle, the mood was festive. 

Volunteers distributed everything from roses and coffee to
fruit. Champagne was poured. Different groups of men and women serenaded the
waiting line, one to the tune of “Going to the Chapel.”

According to the Associated Press, “Hundreds of people,”
(many of whom had waited all night and had lined up hours earlier” shaik
snaking around the downtown Seattle building on a chilly December night.


“We knew it was going to happen, but it’s still
surreal,” said Amanda Dollente, who along with her partner, Kelly
Middleton, began standing in line at 4 p.m. Wednesday.


Among those getting marriage licenses was Dan Savage, who
said, “It’s been a long fight but it ain’t over. We still have to fight (the
Defense of Marriage Act) and there’s 41 other states were same-sex couples
aren’t allowed to marry.”

Savage plans to marry his partner on Sunday in a ceremony at
City Hall.

 Washington has a three-day waiting period, so the first
same-sex marriages can’t be performed in the state until Sunday. Several
members of the clergy have volunteered to perform marriages at three locations,
on Sunday. They are also planning to perform weddings later in the week,
particularly on Wednesday, which carries the notable date of 12-12-12

Washington will be the seventh state to recognize same-sex
marriages. Maine will follow on Dec. 29 and Maryland on Jan. 1 as the result of
votes in those states on similar ballot measures. The other six states (by
order of adoption) are Massachusetts, Connecticut, Iowa, Vermont, New Hampshire
and New York. Washington, D.C. also allows gays and lesbians to marry.


Gay Villains in the News

The Rise of the Gay Villain 

By Shaun Knittel 
Best Gay News Magazine Staff Writer 
A new era of gay rights has ushered in some long awaited changes. The number of states to offer legal same-sex marriage to its taxpayers is on the rise, polling on most issues that are of importance to the LGBT community are beginning to swing in our direction, and although we’ve still got a lot of work to do, it wasn’t half bad being LGBT in 2012.
Interestingly, there’s another aspect of gay visibility on the rise: Gay Villains. 
That’s right, you read that correctly. Gone are the limp-wristed sissies who say “fabulous” after describing nearly everything as such. Written off TV are the vain and effeminate fashion-consciousness gay side-kick that says “You go girl” every time their girlfriend does something to stick up for herself.
 I say, “Thank God.”
And I say, “Good riddance.” 
GLAAD, which tracks representations of gays in pop culture, maintains that as the number of LGBT characters increases in TV and film, it makes sense that there would be more villains. 
The question asked by the Chicago Tribune this weekend is, “whether they are villainous because they are gay, or villains who just happen to also be gay?” 
“In the early days of LGBT characters on screen, it was often the case that a character’s sexual orientation or gender identity was directly tied to their villainous nature as things like lecherous prison guards, blackmailers, or even psychotic killers,” Matt Kane, GLAAD’s associate director of entertainment media, said. 
“Though that’s almost never the case now, it’s still something writers and directors should be conscious of. What this also highlights, however, is that there are still too few LGBT protagonists and leads in popular media, particularly in genre film and television. Where is the gay equivalent to James Bond?” 
He doesn’t exist … yet.
“Today’s gay villains are so stereotypically masculine that we might not know they were gay if they didn’t say so themselves,” said Tim Molloy at Reuters. “They are gay because they like the same sex – not because of their pets.”
 “As an audience, we respect the gay villains a bit more, guessing at the bigotry they’ve likely had to overcome: They have made it to the top of such hyper-masculine and probably homophobic institutions as drug cartels, the Russian mob, and before they went rogue,” writes Molloy.
Read the full story at the Chicago Tribune

LGBT Advocates Push Obama for Executive Order on Discrimination

 LGBT Advocates Push Obama
for Executive Order on
By Shaun Knittel
Best Gay News Magazine Staff Writer
Gay-rights advocates, buoyed by
the approval of same-sex marriage in several states on Election Day, plan to
push President
Obama to go big on their agenda in his second term. According to, the gay groups plan to prod the
president to sign an executive order that would ban discrimination by federal
contractors against gay and transgendered people.
The advocates argue that if Obama
signs the order it could encourage Capitol Hill to pass broader legislation
that would extend a similar ban to employers.
According to, The
White House shelved the executive order earlier this year, but it remains a top
priority for gay-rights supporters want to see movement from the president
“The push is to have them do
it sooner instead of later,” Allison Herwitt , legislative director for
the Human Rights Campaign, said, “I do think
it helps pave the way for a fully inclusive [Employment Non-Discrimination
Act]. … It is the way that the government puts its imprimatur on what’s
important and makes a difference in people’s lives. The president would be
saying it’s important not to discriminate.”
If passed by Congress, the Employment
Non-Discrimination Act
would extend federal protections against
discrimination in the workplace to gay and transgendered people. Lobbyists
working on the bill admit it has a tough road to passage with Republicans still
in control of the House.
Obama has earned praise from
gay-rights advocates for repealing “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” and for endorsing
same-sex marriage. Further, his administration has said expressed support for
the Employment Non-Discrimination Act in the past. An executive order could move
much faster, though, because it would only require a stroke of the president’s

Read the full story at